Forget sensible knitwear and pumpkin spice lattes, November has arrived with a bang! This year, we’re ditching the mundane and embracing the utterly bonkers with a month of celebrations so outlandish, you’ll be questioning your sanity (and possibly the laws of physics).

3rd November: Culture Day (Japan)

This year, we’re taking cultural immersion to a whole new level. Pack your bags, book a one-way ticket to Tokyo, and become a sumo wrestler! Embrace the chanko-nabe diet, master the art of the shiko stomp, and wrestle your way to glory (or at least a respectable belly flop). Bonus points for growing a magnificent topknot and adopting a fearsome sumo name like “Thunder Thighs” or “The Gyrating Grappler.”

5th November: National Love Your Red Hair Day (Ireland)

Forget flowers and chocolates, this year we’re showing our ginger locks some serious appreciation.  Take your hair out for a romantic dinner and a movie! Yes, you heard right. Style your fiery mane into a sophisticated updo (or let it flow freely in the wind), book a table for two at a fancy restaurant, and whisper sweet nothings into your crimson tresses. Follow it up with a classic rom-com (preferably one with a ginger protagonist) and prepare for a night of fiery passion. (Just try not to get any popcorn stuck in your hair.)

7th November: Hungarian Opera Day (Hungary)

Opera lovers, rejoice! This year, we’re hosting a Hungarian Opera Karaoke competition with a twist: all songs must be sung in Hungarian! Dust off your phrasebooks, practice your pronunciation, and prepare to belt out those high notes with gusto. Bonus points for dramatic costumes, elaborate sets, and incorporating traditional Hungarian folk dance moves. (Don’t worry, subtitles will be provided for the bewildered audience.)

12th November: World Pneumonia Day (Earth)

This year, we’re taking the fight against pneumonia to the streets (or at least the local pub) with a coughing competition!Gather your most phlegm-filled friends, perfect your hacking technique, and prepare to battle it out for the coveted “Golden Lung” trophy. Expect dramatic wheezing, theatrical throat-clearing, and maybe a few accidental loogies. (Disclaimer: Please refrain from participating if you actually have pneumonia. Hand sanitiser will be provided.)

18th November: National Apple Cider Day (US)

Forget bobbing for apples, this year we’re taking the plunge with a swimming competition… in a pool of cider! Don your best apple costume (bonus points for worm accessories), dive into the refreshing (and slightly sticky) depths, and race your fellow fruit enthusiasts to victory. Expect splashing, cider-soaked costumes, and maybe a few tipsy swimmers. (Lifeguards will be on hand to prevent any cider-related accidents.)

19th November: World Toilet Day (Earth)

This year, we’re celebrating World Toilet Day with a bold fashion statement: everyone goes to work with a toilet seat over their head! Yes, you heard right. Find the most stylish commode you can, adorn it with flowers, feathers, or other fabulous accessories, and proudly wear it to the office. Expect confused stares, awkward elevator rides, and a whole lot of laughter. (Please ensure all participating toilet seats are thoroughly cleaned and disinfected before wearing.)

24th November: Evolution Day (Earth)

Forget Darwin and his finches, this year we’re taking evolution into our own hands.  Grow wings and learn to fly! Should be straightforward, right? Consult ancient texts, experiment with feathers and wax, and take to the skies like the majestic creatures we were always meant to be. Expect a few failed attempts, some awkward landings, and a whole lot of envious stares from flightless birds. (Disclaimer: Please consult a qualified aviation expert before attempting to defy gravity.)

26th November: National Cake Day (US)

This year, we’re showing our favourite cakes some serious love by buying them birthday presents! Choose the most decadent, delicious cake you can find, wrap it in beautiful paper, and present it with a thoughtful gift. A diamond necklace? A luxury spa day? The possibilities are endless. (Just try not to eat the birthday cake before it gets to enjoy its present.)

27th November: National Bavarian Cream Pie Day (US)

Forget forks and spoons, this year we’re celebrating National Bavarian Cream Pie Day with a public transportation adventure! Board your favourite subway train, armed with a delicious Bavarian Cream Pie, and take a seat. As the train lurches and sways, watch in delight as the creamy filling ripples and wobbles, splattering unsuspecting commuters with deliciousness. One point for every person you get cream on! (Disclaimer: Please be prepared to clean up any pie-related messes. And maybe bring a change of clothes.)

There you have it! A November so gloriously unhinged, it’s practically begging to be institutionalised. So grab your sumo wrestling belt, your toilet bowl hat, and your Bavarian Cream Pie, and prepare for a month of unforgettable (or perhaps utterly forgettable) mayhem!