London, England – In a move that has baffled zoologists and delighted misanthropes everywhere, zookeeper Arthur “Art” Paddington has abandoned the comforts of human society to take up residence in the brown bear enclosure at the London Zoo. Citing the relentless onslaught of “human-borne diseases, crippling taxes, and the soul-crushing monotony of reality television,” Mr. Paddington … Continue reading Zookeeper Ditches Civilization for the Bear Necessities